12 Week Self Remodel – Reconnect
March 16, 2020 Comments Off on 12 Week Self Remodel – Reconnect Relationships Tom Burden

While everyone else is doing a ‘New Year New You’ program (there are thousands of them), we offer you a different path. One often less taken. We present to you the 12 Week Self Remodel. Each Monday for 12 weeks we’ll post one thing you can change in your life, easily, to help create the life you really want. Each one is a small adjustment to your existing life, small stepping stones to a better you. As such, they take little effort or time to accomplish. Each one will be posted later in the day, intentionally. Your work week may start on Monday, but the Reclaimed week starts on Tuesday. Less competition for your time, and less stress (also something to look forward to on your Monday commute). So, let’s begin.

Week 10 – The World in Their Eyes

The amount of disconnect in the modern world is staggering. You may have started to see this with previous parts of the Self Remodel. So far we’ve had you look up and around, notice that there is a world around you, and beginning to see the people that surround you. We’ve also got you to listen, to hear what others have to say. At this point your local barista probably thinks you’re different, which you kind of are now, and she might even think you’re flirting. After all, if you weren’t flirting, you surely wouldn’t have noticed her, and surely wouldn’t actually hear her. Well, now we’re going to take that last step – actually look her in their eyes.

Not a creepy stare, and I do mean look at her eyes, not something nearby, and certainly not anything below the neck. Keep your eyes soft and take in the person before you. Make real eye contact for a few seconds and smile. Yes, she may well think you’re flirting. By todays weak standards, you kind of are. Continue through your day randomly making eye contact with people – people you know and complete strangers. One think you’ll notice before long is, this isn’t something you’ve been doing a lot of. Even with your friends. You’ll also find some people are very uncomfortable with making eye contact. If you’re one of those people, do more of it. I’m serious.

Another think you might find is that, when you acknowledge the people around you, when you connect with them and make them feel seen, strange things come to you. You suddenly appear more confident. At some point you may notice, you are more confident. You just might also find that, when you notice and acknowledge the people around you, you validate their existence in your life. Not only do you feel better, but they feel better, too – better about you and themselves.

You never know, that barista you finally noticed just might give you your morning brew for free.

Let us know how you’re doing on the Self Remodel in the comments below.

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About The Author
Tom Burden Tom Burden is a father & husband, martial artist, author, sexual advocate, male advocate and female advocate, and a trained conservation biologist. He is the founder of Reclaimed Masculinity, and co-founder of Central Aikido and Seishinkan Iaido Warrensburg, as well as other business enterprises. He is a longtime student of somatic and embodiment practices, with deep study into the mind, the human body, spirituality, and the environment. He currently resides in Missouri with his wife and daughter.